Artemis, Harry, Will, and the gang
by UberSpiffySheep
Summary: this includes The charecters from Artemis Fowl, His Dark Materials, Confessions of Georgia nicholson, and of course, Harry potter. i didnt have any idea what story to put it under so i chose this 1.
1. The gardens

Summary: character mix. Harry Potter falls hopelessly in love with Lyra Silvertongue, while Artemis Fowl is secretly crushing on Hermione. Oh, and Georgia Nicholson is thrown in there just for good measure ^__^  
  
A/N: this is humor!! Humor, I tell you. It is not intended to be offensive to anyone.  
  
Disclaimer: Yes. I am Phillip Pullman, J.K. Rowling, Louise Rennison, and Eoin Colfer. At the same time. Not.  
  
Three dark haired boys all sat on the oxford botanic garden bench without speaking to each other. Will Parry was lost in thought, his eyes unfocused, his fists clenched. He swore he could feel Lyra on the other side. Artemis was, too, thinking. But Artemis was thinking about his new plan. If there were faerie worlds, there had to be other ones, right? He thought of a whole new earth to exploit. The thought ran shivers down his evil (ish) spine. Harry Potter was thinking of a spell Hermione had thought of to open a new world, although none of them had been able to work it out yet. They had the spell, Anomaliona. But neither Harry nor Hermione, nor Ron had been able to do it. They had taken it to Dumbledore, who had said they needed "True love and a whole lot of determination" to complete it. (Oh how cliché, I know.) As the boys sat thinking, a brown haired-girl with a whole lot of make-up and a crazy cat walked in.  
  
Georgia Nicholson was in a very bad mood. She was in a bad mood because her loony "family" made her go out to the stupid botanic garden for a lovely little outing. Plus her cat had ruined all of her tights this morning when he was "hunting." As usual, she was bored of the twilight world of the elderly mad.  
  
'Oh look! There's a pink flower!! How gorgeous, even though we have eight billion pink flowers in our bloody window box.' Georgia thought. Then she glanced toward the bench and saw three gorgeous blokes. Mmmm. dark haired, muscled, handsome. She sauntered towards them and sat next to the one (okay, people, I know the oxford bench is only so big, but hey. Think creatively.) with dark, straight eyebrows. She put her tongue behind her back teeth and smiled.  
  
"Hey." She said. The boy looked up with piercing dark eyes. Georgia was taken aback by the intensity of them.  
  
"Hello?" He said, but it came out as a question. A world away, Lyra sensed another girl. Her eyes narrowed and Pan's fur stood on end. Georgia smiled at all of the boys, when Hermione came running into the park, waving a paper around. She was screaming "I found it! I got it!!" She leaped on the bench, and even Will was aroused from his stupor. Georgia toppled off the bench and got up, brushing herself off and gritting her teeth. Hermione and Harry went off to conference. Will let himself settle back into his stupor, when Hermione yelped "Other Worlds!" then both Artemis and Will sat bolt upright, racing over to Hermione and shoving Harry aside. 


	2. The spell

A/N: This chapter is really short. I am very, very sorry.  
  
Disclaimer: Yes, I have multiple personalities, but I don't think anyone can be Eion Colfer, J.K. Rowling, Philip Pullman, and Louise Rennison at the same time.  
  
Title: Artemis, Harry, Will, and the gang (Sucky title, I know)  
  
Reason for this Psycho Story: Me and my friend Siva (more about her, read the Crayon Show. Bwahahahaa) were wondering what would happen if Hermione met Artemis, and if Harry developed an obsession with Lyra. Originally stems from a really strange and random one word story we were doing.  
  
Mae: Oh. My. God. You have read some of my fics? God, I thought after someone read one of them, they would back away slowly. ^__^ Just kidding. Thank you so much, that really made my day.  
  
Kelaal: The first chapter was kind of messed up. Hermione/Artemis is kind of strange, but I figured I'd make it work, because that would be kind of funny. But if you don't like, there will be other funny stuff in it. And Butler is..er...in Bermuda. Sorry, that was messed up. I am horrible at keeping things in character. Ah well..oh, and by the way, Artemis Fowl Meets Harry Potter had to be one of the most spiffy stories in the world (faerie or Mud Man, Ci'gazze or wizarding, Lyra's or Will's)  
  
Chuya: *mouth hangs open* *points with shaking finger* Oh. My. GOD. YOU ARE CHUYA!!! You wrote one of my favorite stories in the entire world!! I loooove Tu m'aimes! It is on my favorite stories list many times over. Oh my god!!! I just can't believe that CHUYA reviewed my story. Sorry, I'm babbling. But CHUYA! *gets carried off into her special padded room.*  
  
Sky Ranae Snape: The Georgia Nicholson books are sooo spiffy!!  
  
Hermione looked terrified. Two boys were converging on her. Besides, this spell was supposed to be a secret. Harry stood in front of her protectively.  
  
"Boys, you are going to have to explain yourselves, please." Will looked faint and unable to speak, so Artemis carried on for him, with Butler (See, Kelaal) standing over him protectively  
  
"Yes, sir, that is where you are right. And my explanation is this" Artemis explained about his plan to exploit other worlds. Will spoke up then, and said simply  
  
"Can we come?" Hermione looked astonished.  
  
"Er.no." Harry said, not too defiantly. Will looked at him imploringly, and Artemis, turning to Butler said  
  
"Butler." Butler, not really wanting to hit these small children, they were just the same size as his charge and the brown haired boy looked so sad, but he still raised his massive fist threateningly. Harry's eyes widened considerable and he nodded mutely.  
  
Meanwhile, Georgia was brushing herself off. "Bloody Swot." She said, glancing at Hermione.  
  
"Excuse me?" Hermione said delicately. Georgia rolled her eyes and went to stand with them all, when Hermione said to Georgia  
  
"YOU can't come. We have no idea who you are, and besides, you insulted me. A swot, I tell you?" Georgia clenched her fists and said, putting her foot down with a firm hand "I'm coming."  
  
Hermione, holding her wand, yelled "Anomaliona" A huge gap between the fabric of worlds appeared, and, catching their breath, Hermione said breathlessly "Shall we?"  
  
And the children stepped into the other world.. 


End file.
